As most of you know, I went back east for my grandson’s graduation from high school and my granddaughter’s graduation from elementary school. My daughter’s son and daughter. It was so much fun and I am so proud of both of them. They’re just really good kids.
I also got to attend my granddaughter’s dance recitals. She’s amazing.
Here’s a pic of her and the rest of the dance crew.
She was dancing to songs from the 80’s. The same songs I used to dance to at the clubs and/or bars, except her outfit was way cuter, and she wasn’t drunk.
Praise Buddha. The generational curse has been broken.
Now, onto what you don’t know… I almost died on my graduation vacation. It’s true. One of my grown children tried to kill me.
(Photo from my Instagram stories.)
Yes. My grown son tried to kill me with edibles, which are perfectly legal in Michigan.
****Edibles – Edibles contain cannabinoids, the active compounds in cannabis, with THC being the psychoactive component responsible for the “high”.
Okay. Yes, I’ve smoked weed. I know, shocker. I dabbled in high school and here and there throughout my life, mainly when I had cancer, but I wasn’t a stoner. So. There’s my midnight confession.
My near-death experience started up north at my oldest son’s home.
– The night before my grandson’s graduation. –
We were all playing Euchre (a card game that not many people have ever heard of). My daughter-in-law and I were on a team, and my oldest son and my almost killer son were on a team. Everything’s going fine, and then my almost killer son says, “Hey Mom, I’ve got those edibles.”
I’m not gonna lie. I was planning on getting some edibles the moment my plane landed. I was worried about TSA and terrified my planes would crash. Anyway, my almost killer son brings out the edibles, they’re gummies. He gives me one split in half. I eat half and set the other half on the table. I don’t know how much time had passed, but holy hell! In the middle of our game, that half of gummy kicked in, and suddenly EVERYTHING was so funny. Like snort laughing, drinks coming out of your nose, pee your pants a little, funny, and I was having such a great time, I ate the other half!
Yeah… I wasn’t having such a great time around 2am.
Just a little FYI – Getting high when you’re young is a whole lot different than getting high when you’re in your 60s! Bumping into furniture and falling is not an option in your 60s. I’ve got bruises that I don’t even know where they came from, but I do know this. At some point, I thought I was dying. D.Y.I.N.G.
I’m not even kidding, I could feel my heartbeat in every square inch of my body, and for the longest time, I couldn’t close my eyes because my eyelids were beating like my heart, and I thought if I closed my eyes, my heart beat would stop and I’d die. And then, I was so hot I kept going in and out of the front door, and lo and behold, my son has one of those porch lights that light up when you go out the door! That thing was going off like a fucking disco ball!
Thankfully, my daughter-in-law was still up, reading on the couch, but my oldest son and the one who tried to kill me had gone to bed – of course. I don’t know how long my daughter-in-law sat there watching me be a crazy person, but at some point she texted the almost killer son, and when he came upstairs, I think I yelled at him, “I’m dying. I’m too old for gummies. You have to take me to the emergency room. I’m dying!” He was so calm. His mother was dying before his murderous eyes, and he’s calm. I thought for sure he would rush me to his vehicle and race off to save my life, but no. No. That is not what happened. He gave me breathing exercises to do. Counting 1, 2, 3, 4, and then 4, 3, 2, 1. Over and over and over again! I was a dying, crazy person acting like Count Von Count from Sesame Street!
Needless-to-say, the counting worked, and the next thing I knew, I was waking up in bed, thankful I wasn’t waking up on the front porch! Ugh. Of course, the nosy neighbor saw everything that happened. Whatever. I was just happy to be alive.
Can you imagine if I had gone to the emergency room and missed my grandson’s graduation?? Sorry, Mimi couldn’t make it; she got high last night and almost died.
SIDE NOTE – My son did not almost kill me. I was okay. I just had to chill, which is what I thought edibles were supposed to help you do… I took too much. I guess that “Party like it’s 1999” ship has sailed. Totally my fault. He did tell me not to take that other half… He’s a good son and obviously knows how to take care of his mama when he needs to. Lol. He’s a lot of fun, and I love and miss him every day! I love and miss them all!
So, there you have it. My near-death experience. My kids and grandsons thought it was so funny, and then they tell me, if you haven’t been high in a while or had edibles, you should start with 2.5mg gummies. 2.5mg??? I had 25mg!!! – Just for the record, that’s the THC.
My takeaway lesson? I’m sticking with wine.
Wow. Long post. If you made it this far, I hope you had a good laugh and learned a little something about edibles. It’s definitely not like the old days when making weed brownies was the go-to edible.
I hope you’re all having a great day. We’re halfway to the weekend. Who’s got plans? Who’s got an edibles story?? I can’t be the only one… Spill it in the comments. Lol. We won’t judge.
MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
♥ mimi ♥
Magical Mystical Mimi 
Bwahahahahahaha. I laughed out loud with your half a gummy kicking in. I can so relate.
I linked this post to Wordless Wednesday.
Have a fabulous day and rest of the week. Love and hugs, Karen. ♥
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Lol. Omg. What has happened?? I used to be so cool. Lol. Criminy! I won’t be doing that again! – And thank you for linking me. Love you Sandee. You have a great rest of your week too.
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BAHAHA! I busted out laughing at this: “Sorry, Mimi couldn’t make it; she got high last night and almost died.” OMG, that is HILARIOUS!!!!! But I’m so sorry, as it sounds like a HORRIFIC experience!!! But I have to say, I fault the manufacturer for making ONE edible so damn strong! I’d never think that you’d have to tear a gummy in half. Was there a warning label on this?? Call RFK, Jr., stat! LOL!!!
FTR, I haven’t had any Mary Jane since the ’80’s, so I have no idea about potency, etc. However, two weekends ago, we went to a brewery (called Wrecking Crew, so the name sort of tells you the type of establishment, as does the decor) with friends. I don’t drink beer anymore because the carbs make me feel ill, so I was going to order their hard seltzer. Well, thank God I read the fine print (because my hubby never does) because it contained THC! I decided to stick with wine, which sounds like that was a wise decision!
Glad you made it safely home and thanks for the GREAT story! I love funny trip stories (like last year when my husband and I thought we were going to a winery and ended up walking into someone’s home :)
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Omg. They make them stronger! It’s nuts. – Call RFK Jr., stat! Hahahahaha! He probably eats them like candy! – I just like a little buzz, something to just chill. I don’t want to breathe thru my eyeballs! Holy hell but that was something. Funny in the beginning and funny now but when I thought I was dying. Nope. I don’t ever need to feel like that again. Mimi is definitely a light weight and I’m okay with that. But seriously. How embarrassing would it have been if I missed the graduation?? Omg. I’m so happy that didn’t happen! – THC in the seltzer?? My daughter drinks that. I’ll have to have her check hers! Yep. Wine it is. Wine has never done me wrong. Well, maybe that one time my girlfriend and I ran a food truck in high school… Lol. Maybe that will be another post… :) – I’m happy you enjoyed the story. I have another one I’ll be posting… Not as exciting but still funny and it involves my daughter’s dogs and chickens. Lol. – Omg. I loved that story about you guys walking into someone’s home!!! Lol. I think I’m going to start posting funny stories on Fridays. So many to choose from. You should do it too! You go on a lot of outings. I know you’ve got some stories to share!
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Wow! What a scary experience! I’ve never tried edibles and haven’t smoked weed in decades. Think I’ll stick to booze as well. 😆 Besides that, I’m glad you had a good visit with your kids and grandkids.
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Thank you. The visit was great and it was great seeing everyone but clearly my cool days have passed. Lol.
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Yikes. Sounds like an anxiety attack, but what do I know? And no, I don’t have an edibles story. I don’t even drink alcohol. (My mother once said she wanted to see me drunk. Well, now that can never happen.)
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It was pretty scary at the end. I never did ask the kids how long I was nutso. It felt like an eternity. Not having an edible story and not drinking alcohol is okay too. And I’m sorry your Mom never got to see you drunk but I believe she still can so feel free to pick up that bottle of wine on your way home. :)
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Yeah, not going to happen. I will continue not to drink. Not a fan of wine, either.
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And that’s okay too. :) I only like sweet wines.
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I’ve always been too straight laced to indulge, but I’ll be there to take you to the ER or clean up after you get sick or whatever else you might need. I figured out early someone needed to be the designated driver and make sure no one ended up dead or pregnant at the end of the night (tattooed is your own lookout), so it might as well be me.
Your story was funny.
Congratulations to the grandchildren.
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Omgosh. You are the most important person in the circle of friends! Especially for a friend like me. Lol. I’ve always been fortunate to have a friend like you in my circle. Definitely a life saver. – Thank you for your congratulations. They worked hard and I am super proud of them.
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Sounds like a fun trip. :)
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It was! So much fun!
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Whew! I am glad you didn’t die! And got to see the graduation and the dancing. You won’t get an edibles story from me, I’ve never taken ANYTHING, ever. Never even smoked or drank. Yeah, I’m dull.
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Thank you! Me too! Not smoking and/or drinking does not make you dull, not even the least little bit. :)
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All kids are good.
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Not always…
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