bugs bunny whats up doc

As most of you know that read my blog. I am not a t.v. watcher. I know my pal ‘The Cranky Old Man’ is, and you should go over to his place and read his posts, “Watching T.V. With Mrs. Cranky” and ‘Yelling At The T.V.‘ – He’s written others about t.v. viewing but these two are my favorite. Oh, and the one about the remote
So, being a professed, non-t.v. watcher – and no, Netflix, Hulu, YouTube, Vudu, and Amazon Prime binging don’t count… – I found myself missing local t.v., namely, the local news. And in truth, it wasn’t even the news I was missing, it was the familiarity of going to bed after the news, that I’ve missed.
Apparently at age 52, I need an alarm clock for my bedtime.
Sad but true.
When all the kids were home I had cable and inet. Mainly because I never wanted my kids to carry that stigma of being “that family.” You know, the weirdo family on the block that doesn’t let their kids watch t.v. or have pop? Yeah, “those people.” I wasn’t going to be one of “them.” Plus, it’s a lot more fun watching t.v. when you have someone to snuggle n’ giggle with. Once that was over so was my need for t.v.
Fast forward to now and inet streaming. I reeeallly don’t need t.v. now, but I want it.
And now it’s just the idea of it. I feel like our local cable company is trying to force me into signing up with them and I’m just not going to.
I’m not.
We have wifi through our local cable company. We had to pay a $200 deposit because we hadn’t had service with this company before. Fine. I’ll pay, with the understanding that the $200 deposit does, in fact, come back to us because we’ve paid our bill on time for x amount of months. Perfect. There should be no issues with this since it’s an auto pay right off of the credit card.
Now, being established wifi customers and having paid our $200 deposit for never having had service with them before, and having apparently passed whatever credit checks we needed to pass, I decided to call our wifi provider and inquire about adding basic cable.
All I want is my local news. How expensive could that be??
– And here’s where I turn into the “Italian Jew girl.” –
To add basic cable to our wifi plan, they want another $200 deposit  AND a $250 deposit on their cable box, or $350 if we want the DVR.
Another $200 deposit? But we’ve already paid a $200 deposit. We’re already customers. We passed all the tests. We’re not new. We have credit.
Yeah, not so fast…
 – The new $200 deposit is for the cable service, which is separate from the wifi service.
* Really? So I’ll be getting two separate bills? One for wifi, one for cable?
– No. It’s all one itemized bill.
* Great. Then why another $200 deposit?
…..And here’s the part where I consider how many months of prison time I’d like to endure….
– Because it’s a separate service. Wifi and cable aren’t the same.
….Really dumb ass? I didn’t know….
* So, if I had ordered cable at the same time I ordered my wifi I would’ve had to pay a $400 deposit plus an equipment fee of $250/350?
– No.
* Then why do I have to pay an additional $200 to add cable to my already existing service?
– Because it’s a separate service.
Enter thoughts of homicide and my “wascally wabbit ears.” I hadn’t really thought about a t.v. antenna since I lived in the “Twilight Zone” of Arkansas, so far out in the boonies the only neighbors we had were the white supremacists. – Not even kidding. – We had a GIANT outdoor antenna semi-bolted to the side of our ooollllddddd farmhouse right next to our firewood window – true story, a small window, no screen, to pass firewood through. – Which was super handy for when it rained, which was nearly every day, and the picture went out on the t.v., which was also nearly every day.. We could just reach out the window and give our towering antenna a little spin and boom! Just like that, we were watching t.v. again.
Not even kidding folks. Just a sliver of my life…
That experience was pretty much my last with any kind of an antenna. Until now.
It’s the year 2016. I figured this whole t.v. antenna thing had to have rolled with the times, right? And hooray, it has! We now have t.v.! All of the local channels and a few really weird cable stations but t.v. just the same, with zero to very little weather interference.
So, for $20 bucks, not another $200 deposit PLUS $250/350 for equipment fees, I have my bedtime alarm clock again!
Woo hoo! Go me, right???
It’s the little things folks…
I’m not in for a full day just yet but I could be…