(X)YLOLOGY – Blogging from A to z

Throwing caution to the wind today because hey, we’re on the letter X and this was the most interesting “X” word I could find.
XylologyThe study of wood.
For this post, “wood” will be defined by the Urban Dictionary of all things slang.
Example: “Shamiqua was jonesin’ for my jock, so I slipped her the good wood.”
Yeah, let’s just go ahead and give this one to the devil…
If you’re a woman who’s married or in a relationship, you’ve willingly, unwillingly or subconsciously, been a student of Xylology.And if you’ve been married a super long time or have been in a long term relationship you’ve probably got a degree in it.
Hang it on the wall.
The first morning you woke up next to your beloved. You earned it.

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been nearly impaled by this.Here are some more “X” words pertaining to “wood” and their definitions.
Xylogenous – growing on wood.
***Run. Stay away from all wood that has something growing on it!

Xyloglyphy – wood carving.
Xylography – art of engraving on wood
Xylopyrography – engraving designs on wood with hot poker
***One word – OUCH!

Xylopolist – one who sells wood.
***Also known as prostitution. Stay away from this guy too.

Xylophilous – fond of wood.
***Me!

Xylophagous – wood eating.
***Guilty.

Xylotomous – wood cutting.
***Think Lorena Bobbit.

And because there are few lines I won’t cross….
Xylan – gelatinous compound found in wood
***It’s been said probably by men that this gelatinous compound is pure protein.
If that’s the case ladies, instead of waking up and rummaging thru the fridge for this…

Let your man serve you breakfast in bed instead.
Coincidence? I think not.

(W)ONDER – Blogging from A to Z

‘W’ is for “wonder.” As in I wonder how I’m going to make it through these last 3 letters of the alphabet. For being only 26 letters it sure feels like a million and 26! Ugh. And now I’m being another ‘w’ word – whiner!
Some days it feels just like that…
Yep. I’m pretty sure you could Mr. Fender.
If I were a man I’d be using that thing as a lightsaber!

Butterflies? No. Boners? Yes.Hopefully hitting the lottery…wonder breadPlease step away from the ‘Wonder Bread…’

It would become an English speaking state of carnivores?? Just a guess.I wonder how many people I’ve offended with this post.
Just kidding. I never wonder that.