Month: January 2019

OH SNAP! – #9

As you may have guessed, I’ve been gone for a bit.
I had a minor hurts like a son-of-a-bitch surgery and “Blake & Miranda” graciously allowed me to recoup at their place.
It was a wonderful mini vacay filled with amazing people, great food, homeschooling from hell and lots of love and laughter.
Omg, this just makes me laugh so much…
All in all, I’d say the mini vacay was…
Happy Monday, folks!
For those of you in the deep freeze and snow in the east, be safe and stay warm!
For everyone else, none of you get to bitch about your weather unless it’s as extreme or beyond extreme, as the weather in the east.

I won’t pretend to know all of the ins and outs of the government shut down.
I will simply say that I am grateful it is over and that my brother and his family and other families like his will now be receiving back pay and paychecks once again.

Endless thanks to those who don’t get paid enough as it is but continued to keep us safe despite no income.

MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY –
Time – 6:45am
Temp – 27 degrees F/highs in the 40’s today
Mood – Pretty good for someone who’s been awake since 3am
Bitch, bitch, bitch – That crazy weather in Michigan! 
Best thing – Knowing my family is safe and warm back in the mitten.
Be well.

MIDNIGHT AT THE OASIS… – #8

First of all, let me apologize for the earworm that got stuck in your head just from the title alone. I’m not talking about midnight at this oasis…
Buttttttt… Can I just say, I miss those clothes, that hair, and the music.


I’m talking about “Blake & Miranda’s Mountain Oasis.”
This is pretty much the winter months, give or take a few inches of snow.
This is the summer.
So. When I write that I’m heading to “Miranda’s” I’m sure you’ll all understand if it takes me a few days to come back. It’s so relaxing and when you walk in the door to “Blake n’ Miranda’s” home not only do you feel like family, you are family.

You may remember my post ‘Miranda Throws A Pleasure Party.’ It’s my most viewed post to date. If you haven’t read it, you should. That post will really give you a view of what lies at the foot of those beautiful mountains up there.
Well… pleasure parties, homeschooling, fantastic home cooking and running a ranch!

Speaking of homeschooling… Kudos to every homeschooling mom/dad on the planet! The school work has changed SOOOOO much it’s unreal. I look at the math and I’m like, nope, I’m out. Give me books, words and art and I’m in.
Side note: The 1st photo and the 6th may be the most accurate.

This is me if I were a homeschooler.Oh, and if you’re curious about “Blake’s” role at the “oasis” here’s a couple of pics of just one of the things he does.
See that road on the side of the mountain? Yeah. He keeps those clear…
Day and night…
And can you believe people still bitch if the roads aren’t smooth as glass?
Seriously…
Back in the city, I’m just hangin’ out doin’ what I do. We finally got some snow! About a half an inch. Woo hoo! Just enough to freeze at night and make the roads icy but hey, no complaints. Here’s our week ahead…
That’s just nuts! I wish all of our Januarys were like this!
Today looks like a great day to get some reading done.
I’m currently reading two books. Yep. I’m that kind of reader…
“Miranda” gave me ‘Gone Girl’ for Christmas. A real book, paperback and I checked out ‘The Giver’ from my local library via my phone using the Libby app. I’m determined to reach my reading goals this year on Goodreads!
So, what’s Wednesday looking like for all of you??? Almost to the weekend. Anybody have plans?? I have a dental appt. on Friday. Go me! I hate the dentist…
As always. Feel free to spill the beans in the comments below.

Also. The Goodreads link up there is to my Goodreads page so if any of you want to share some great books add me to your list. I’m always looking for the next great read.

Have a great rest of your week!
MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY –
Time – 5:47am
Temp – 26 degrees F/cloudy/it’s fucking dark still!
Mood – AWAKE!!!!
Bitch, bitch, bitch –This moron, John Engler. What a douche!
Michigan State University Interim President and former GOP Michigan governor John Engler is facing backlash for saying that “some Larry Nassar sexual assault victims are enjoying the attention.”
Best thing – It’s early so I’m going with my bottomless coffee cup!
Be well.

 

MY WALTER – #7

No, not that Walter…

THIS WALTER!
THIS Walter is my Walter!
My Walter was awarded to me by one of my most favorite blogs on the net, ‘The Cranky Old Man.’ – FYI, he’s not really cranky, well, not all of the time… Mrs. Cranky pretty much keeps him in line so it’s safe to visit his blog and you should.
GO NOW!
Click on the pic of my Walter.
I’ll wait.
Per ‘The Cranky Old Man’ here’s the 411 on awarding and receiving the ‘The Walter.’

“I believe there cannot be enough blog awards, I have added my own.  It is named after Jeff Dunham’s hysterical cranky old man puppet, “Walter.”

This award recognizes those bloggers who post consistent (2 days a week or more) original, humorous, thought provoking material, and or anyone I damn well feel like awarding it to.

To accept this award, you need only grab it from above and display it on your blog.  (I assume no responsibility if it is stolen copy written material)”

SOOOOOOOOOO, thank you, thank you, thank you, Cranky. It is an honor to receive this award especially from someone as funny – not cranky – as you.
(If you read this post where I was bitching about blog awards going to the wayside you’ll see why this ‘Walter’ award makes me so happy.)
Come hell or high water people, much like Justin Timberlake brought sexy back, I will bring real blogging back!
Yuuuucccckkkkkkkk!
Nooooooooooo! Not that sexy! In fact, that’s NOT sexy!!!
Holy hell… I need to check myself before I wreck myself!

This…
This is sexy being brought back!
Hi everyone! Happy Monday!!!
I’ve been away spending some much needed time at “Miranda’s” mountain oasis. More on that in tomorrows post.Today is all about laundry, phone calls, maybe appts./hopefully appts. and possibly some crafting of some sort.
Definitely reading!
Here’s to an amazing week ahead filled with nothing but all good things!!!
MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY –
Time – 5:54pm
Temp – 35 degrees F w/cloudy skies
Mood – Great!
Bitch, bitch, bitch – I pulled a cuticle and it hurts!
Best thing – Getting the ball rolling…
Be well.

CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND… – #6

‘Germany’s 3rd gender law.’
Are you fucking kidding me right now???
“On January 1, Germany will become the first country in the European Union to offer a “third gender” option on birth certificates.”
Anybody remember this???
Yeah… I’m pretty sure this was Spielberg’s idea of the “third kind.”
I can see how the German’s might have gotten confused…
You can read the full article by clicking on the links above but the gist of the “3rd gender” are the people who are born with both male and female genitalia.
Raise your hand or just give me the ‘ol German salute if you remember when these people were called hermaphrodites.

What the actual hell??? Why are we adding a 3rd gender to our already fucked up world?? This is beyond ridiculous. Why are people buying into this?? What? We’re just going to add genders to society based on what was recognized not that long ago in the medical field as a diagnosis??!

Holy fuck. We’re still trying to get women in this world paychecks equal to that of men and the Germans want to add a 3rd gender?? Good luck with that.

In my world, it’s guys n’ dolls and unless God and Jesus Christ come down and tell me that there’s a 3rd kind, I’m stickin’ with what I know.
Remember, it was Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, there was no third kind.
Oh. Wait. There was…
MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY –
Riiiiiggghhhhtttttt….

Time – 12:29pm
Temp – 38 degrees F
Mood – Happy
Bitch, bitch, bitch – ZERO! This must be a record!
Best thing – Heading to the mountains to spend some much needed time with “Miranda” and fam.

Be well.

YOU DOWN WITH OBC??? – #5

What happened to the “Original Blogging Community???” I used to love peeking into the windows of my fellow bloggees who so graciously shared their little corners of the world with us and I with them, you… Anybody, everybody.

We were connected back then and what we wrote was the real deal. We didn’t sugar coat shit. If somebody was having a bad day, they shared it with us. If someone’s kid was being an asshat, that was shared too. Husband issues, work issues, family, neighbors. WE SHARED! And most importantly we supported one another. We encouraged one another, we cheered each other on and when one of us laughed we all laughed and when one of us cried, we all cried.

We used to give out awards! What the hell happened to those??? I was the award whore. I LOVED getting awards! Did we all suddenly become so fucking busy that we totally disconnected from our sacred community where we once shared our hopes and dreams, joys and sorrows, and sometimes, deep dark secrets with one another???

The answer to that is yes and no. We didn’t totally disconnect.
Some of us stayed connected JUST enough to gain followers and sell our products.

One word destroyed our tight-knit neighborhood.
– NUMBERS –

Our bloggee minds became so clouded by the need to be the next JK Rowlings or Oprah or Martha Stewart or Kate Spade, okay maybe not Kate… the next Vera Wang that a huge majority of us didn’t even know why we were blogging anymore.

“Sorry, I’ve got a book/dress/hat/mugs/t-shirts to sell, an article to submit, omg, The Huffington Post wants me!” – I get it and there’s no shame in the game. Everybody has that brass ring they’re reaching for. I honestly do get it.

I sell shit so I know the importance of having a broad audience.
I also know the importance of not losing touch with the tried and true.
The audience who was there and continues to be there from your first word on your blog to your first book/tv show/podcast/magazine cover, etc.

Basically, I just miss the original bloggees from the hood and kickin’ it old school.
Just my opinion. Agree. Disagree. That’s the vibe I’m feeling.
Lemme’ know in the comments below.
MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY –

Time – 12:10am
Temp – 39 degrees F
Mood – Creative…
Bitch, bitch, bitch – Zero bitching today.
Best thing – Starting a new project.Be well.

SEEK & FIND – #4

Do you guys ever check the stats page for your blog? I do occasionally but I’m not overly interested in a lot of the feedback there.
– I’m not a numbers counter –
I do, however, check the “search terms” section, mainly, because some of them are so fucking bizarre that not on your wildest crack pipe night do they have anything at all to do with my blog posts!

Here are just a few…
PS – I’ve omitted the search terms that made me want to vomit and had absolutely nothing what-so-ever to do with my blog.

1.) now bring us a sticky pudding
I don’t know about you but I’m not a fan of anything sticky.
Not sticky hands, not sticky seats, not sticky tables and NO sticky pudding!
2.) girl sleep his armpit in love
Noooooooooo. Being in love has NOTHING to do with armpit sleeping!!!
I’ve blogged about this smelly sleep position before.
Read “Reality vs. Romance.”

3.) tgif titties
‘Thank God It’s Friday’ titties??? Really???
I wouldn’t get too excited.
It’s Friday. That means it’s the beginning of the weekend.
That means all bras are off!
4.) ann curry lips
I like these smug “fuck you Matt Lauer” lips.
5.) massage mit happy end
Hhhhmmm…
I wonder if this is what they were searching for…
6.) big ass mom
7.) people’s opinions on rocky mountain oysters
If they’re good enough for Captain Kirk…
8.) bitch romantic night
Nerd alert!
I got this when I searched for “bitch romantic night.”
9.) snoopy watching tv
I feel ya’ Snoop. Somedays it be like that.
10.) i take titty tuesday very seriously
I didn’t know about “titty Tuesday” but I do have my very own, “Tough Titty Tuesday.”
Last year at this time Mariah Carey was the star!
‘TOUGH TITTY TUESDAY – THE DIVA TAKES A DIVE”

11.) wabbit
12.) xmas ball horror
I’m so happy it was just something as harmless as this…
And not something freaky like this!
Aaahhhh… I can hear you all now…
“We sure missed that Mimi…”
Hahahahahaha.
Never fear. As always, Mimi’s blog posts come with a complimentary bottle of eye bleach.
You’re welcome.
MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY –
Well, that’s somewhat frightening given what people were seeking throughout this whole post… Freeeeaaaaks
Time – 7:52pm
Temp – 28 degrees F
Mood – Crafty jokester. Everything is funny today.
Bitch, bitch, bitch – People who know nothing of parking lot courtesy or how to back up in the parking lot… What a stop sign means..
Idiots.
Best thing – Pictures of my grandbabies are better than the best they’re the greatest!

Be well.

BEST MEMORY OF 2018 – #3

The night it ended.
MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY –
It truly was….
Time – 6:27pm
Temp – 33 degrees F and no complaints
Mood – Expecting great things
Bitch, bitch, bitch – Politics. I can’t turn the channel or click off of a page online fast enough. It’s just too much.
Best thing – Moving forward!
Be well.

2-0-1-9 – JANUARY GOALS – #2

No kidding!!! Get the fuck outta’ here 2018 WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME 2019!!!!
If this could be a year without any major illnesses or death that.would.be.AWESOME!
holy hell…
No resolutions for me. I make personal contracts and the only contract I have with myself in 2019 is to be healthier than I was in 2018 and to keep breathing!
That’s all I’m looking for in the coming year.

I don’t care if I accomplish this in a box with a fox, in a house with a mouse or on the train in the fucking rain.
I will not get sick. No sir. No, ma’am.
I’m going to live. Oh yes, I AM!
I was thinking I wouldn’t come back to blogging but here I am. Turns out I just needed a break and most importantly, all of you sent me messages or left me sad faces when I said I was closing the blog.
Funny thing about having your own blog. You can close it and open it as much as you want. Much like your legs…
So. Go me and thank YOU!!!
Here in the blogging world we always pick a “Word of the Year.”
I’ve never thought about it before but I wonder how many people outside of our crazy world choose one as well.
If anyone outside of our blogging bubble can fill me in please drop it in the comments below.
Ooooookaaaaayyyyyy…. Drum roll, please…
2019 WORD OF THE YEAR –
I use my WOTY as a personal compass. My beacon of light shining upon my path in the New Year.
This year I’ve been going back n’ forth on a couple of words but I couldn’t choose! So, to hell with it. I’m picking two words for my wordsssssssss of the year. Because I can.

First up –
Inhale. Exhale. One foot in front of the other.
BREATHE!!!

This. 110%. EVERY SINGLE DAY!

Next up –
Truly, I just need to get my shit together.
Too many proverbial irons in the fire, emotionally and physically.
Raise your hand if you’ve been there??
I need to rein some things in.
2018 was a rough year for me. I felt like I was in a human taffy pull.
A word of advice to 2019, hands off. No pushing or pulling or tugging. In fact, in the words of John Lennon, just “let it be.”
Let me be…
HAPPY NEW YEAR, TO ALL OF YOU!!!!!!
Raise your hand if you’re standing tall facing day two of 2019 with a smile on your face and a fire in your soul!

Raise your hand if spent New Year’s Eve at home, crashing at a friend’s or waking up next to a stranger thinking you’ve chalked up yet one more questionable life decision.
Raise your hand if your head still feels like it’s exploding and you can’t find your shoes or bra.

Raise your hand if you’d like to share all of those down n’ dirty details in the “Mimi Zone” where your questionable decisions and self-inflicted stupidity will be laughed at and judged accordingly.

It’s 2019, people!!!!
Time to get “jiggy with it!”
Speaking of questionable decisions…
Why yes, yes I did just quote Will Smith on my blog…
What the fuck is the matter with me??? It’s too early and I need coffee… LOTS of coffee…
MIMI’S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY –
Time – Too early!
Temp – Fucking cold.
Mood – Ready for spring!
Bitch, bitch, bitch – Politics. I just can’t deal with anymore…
Best thing – IT’S A BRAND NEW YEAR PEOPLE!!!!!
Be well.